you can't hug every tree
I don't know what it is that draws me to the trees of California, but there is something special about them. I think I am beginning to see the genesis of the phrase, "tree hugger". They are glorious. It could be that I haven't seen a tree with leaves on it in such a long time and I am just being romantic about the whole thing, or it could be that I have been driving for too long and the dementia is mixing up my noodle. What ever the case may be, I am diggin' these trees.
Perhaps it's because there is no such thing as an ugly tree. Trees, for all their variety in shape, construction, genetics and use, are all pretty to look at. There is no tree scale that I am aware of, that rates trees on their looks. Unlike humans, who can really challenge the depths of ugliness from time to time.
Someone once told me that there were more trees than people on the planet. That might have been true along time ago, but I am cursed with knowledge and I know that places like India, China, Africa, South America and Oklahoma exist and I know they love to breed. I know that people have probably surpassed the trees in numbers by this point. Trees are just too slow on the procreation to keep up with us. It's either that, or trees are pickier than we are when it comes to gettin' it on.
I am not always in the mood for trees, but sometimes they can make my whole day. I'm sure that there are other people like me out there. People that are wishy washy on the tree issue. I don't blame them. I know that there are times when seeing a tree is considered a bad thing - downhill skiing, flying a kite, during a tornado when the tree is "in flight", on the side of narrow, curvy, icy road, or on a dark and stormy night around Halloween when you are walking alone. However, I think these pale in comparison to the times when seeing a tree is a good thing - lost in a desert, a drift at sea and needing something to hold onto, on a hot day in the summer sun, when being chased by wolves, when you need fuel for a fire, or when you have the craving to carve a bear sculpture with a chainsaw. I think these moments make trees the special addition to the life of this planet and therefore, always a good thing. Let's face it, how often do we feel the need to carve a bear sculpture?
California is full of trees. In fact, it's home to the largest trees in the world. Sadly, when people think of visiting California their first thoughts are of Disneyland, LA or San Fran. They overlook the fact that California is 70, 000 square miles of natural beauty or they never see it because each of the big three metro areas is surrounded by mountains and covered in smog, fog or flying Dumbos. The northern half of the state is pine forests and majestic redwoods (if you haven't seen a redwood, it will amaze you in a way that meeting a movie star or Donald Duck, will not). In the middle and southern part of the state, you see the orchards of olive, nut and fruit trees. There are also various other mid-sized trees that simple call out to you and say, "salad!". These trees are great trees.
It's unfortunate that most people will never see them. Most people fly in, do what they have to do and fly out. Never getting a chance to view some of California's original and sexiest residents. You could travel the countryside for years and never see every tree that lives here. There are just too many of them. But each is as beautiful and colorful in a way that each actor in LA is dull and lifeless.
I don't think we will ever see the number of trees in our world reach "one" and I don't think we will ever see an award show that celebrates tree beauty. As long as the number of beautiful trees outweighs the ugly ones, I think we will have trees. However, the day we start to see ugly trees, I think we should view that as an omen and seriously consider euthanizing the people of Oklahoma and Kansas. If the end is near, then we need to thin out the herd to create more time for us, the beautiful people, to survive a little bit longer. (for you religious people that would have a problem with my statement, I say this.... The ugly people are going to need more time to get into heaven and so we are giving them a headstart. Beautiful people rarely have to stand in line for anything. There is no reason for us to dely the ugly people's entrance into heaven by stuffing the front of the line with beautiful sure-ins. I think this is the most generous thing that beautiful have ever done.)
Perhaps it's because there is no such thing as an ugly tree. Trees, for all their variety in shape, construction, genetics and use, are all pretty to look at. There is no tree scale that I am aware of, that rates trees on their looks. Unlike humans, who can really challenge the depths of ugliness from time to time.
Someone once told me that there were more trees than people on the planet. That might have been true along time ago, but I am cursed with knowledge and I know that places like India, China, Africa, South America and Oklahoma exist and I know they love to breed. I know that people have probably surpassed the trees in numbers by this point. Trees are just too slow on the procreation to keep up with us. It's either that, or trees are pickier than we are when it comes to gettin' it on.
I am not always in the mood for trees, but sometimes they can make my whole day. I'm sure that there are other people like me out there. People that are wishy washy on the tree issue. I don't blame them. I know that there are times when seeing a tree is considered a bad thing - downhill skiing, flying a kite, during a tornado when the tree is "in flight", on the side of narrow, curvy, icy road, or on a dark and stormy night around Halloween when you are walking alone. However, I think these pale in comparison to the times when seeing a tree is a good thing - lost in a desert, a drift at sea and needing something to hold onto, on a hot day in the summer sun, when being chased by wolves, when you need fuel for a fire, or when you have the craving to carve a bear sculpture with a chainsaw. I think these moments make trees the special addition to the life of this planet and therefore, always a good thing. Let's face it, how often do we feel the need to carve a bear sculpture?
California is full of trees. In fact, it's home to the largest trees in the world. Sadly, when people think of visiting California their first thoughts are of Disneyland, LA or San Fran. They overlook the fact that California is 70, 000 square miles of natural beauty or they never see it because each of the big three metro areas is surrounded by mountains and covered in smog, fog or flying Dumbos. The northern half of the state is pine forests and majestic redwoods (if you haven't seen a redwood, it will amaze you in a way that meeting a movie star or Donald Duck, will not). In the middle and southern part of the state, you see the orchards of olive, nut and fruit trees. There are also various other mid-sized trees that simple call out to you and say, "salad!". These trees are great trees.
It's unfortunate that most people will never see them. Most people fly in, do what they have to do and fly out. Never getting a chance to view some of California's original and sexiest residents. You could travel the countryside for years and never see every tree that lives here. There are just too many of them. But each is as beautiful and colorful in a way that each actor in LA is dull and lifeless.
I don't think we will ever see the number of trees in our world reach "one" and I don't think we will ever see an award show that celebrates tree beauty. As long as the number of beautiful trees outweighs the ugly ones, I think we will have trees. However, the day we start to see ugly trees, I think we should view that as an omen and seriously consider euthanizing the people of Oklahoma and Kansas. If the end is near, then we need to thin out the herd to create more time for us, the beautiful people, to survive a little bit longer. (for you religious people that would have a problem with my statement, I say this.... The ugly people are going to need more time to get into heaven and so we are giving them a headstart. Beautiful people rarely have to stand in line for anything. There is no reason for us to dely the ugly people's entrance into heaven by stuffing the front of the line with beautiful sure-ins. I think this is the most generous thing that beautiful have ever done.)
posted by Daniel Loomis | 3:01 PM
<< Home