QUESTIONS OF THE WEAK
I AM ONLY GOING TO POST THE QUESTIONS THAT I THINK HAVE MERIT. I CAN'T ANSWER EACH QUESTION YOU ASK BECAUSE SOME ARE TOO OBVIOUS AND SOME ARE RIDICULOUSO. HERE'S WHAT I HAVE FOR YOU THIS TIME AROUND. REMEMBER TO INCLUDE THE DAMN POST TITLE WHEN YOU WRITE THESE QUESTIONS.
What is the male equivalent of Bukkake?
Well, gay men love a good bukkake. Actually, there isn't a man that has ever lived that doesn't want to be in the middle of an orgy. I think that every male lives on the belief that his life will one day be, if it's not already, the center of the female sexual world.
Have you ever participated in a bukkake?
Hmmmm... I have put my "stuff" in some pretty interesting places. But never with the intention of being a "bukkake".
Do you really believe all that stuff about Iran and Canada?
Yes. Even though I was experiencing some serious delirium, I have been thinking about these issues for a while and have written about it before (i just didn't post it) but with the Canadian election and my willingness to showcase my mental status, I felt that the timing was perfect. If I were you, I would invest in bicycle tires and chain oil.
Do you think the Carlyle group is behind the recent decline in western civilization?
Yes - among other entities. Check out the money winners on the NASDAQ and AMEX since 9-11 and you can see who is responsible for what is happening to us today. The majority of the money makers earned lucrative, secret military contracts and are making so much money that they could have bought freedom from terrorism by now. Of course, not all of the big winners on the market are war profiteers, but if you follow the paper work, it all comes back to Haliburton, Carlyle and specialized Economic Development Corporations that Former Presidents are a part of.
What is wrong with your throat?
tonsillitis. Yucky white things started growing on my throat. I can't blame it on the Carlyle group, but I think a universal karma was working against me. I believe enough people held hands and prayed for me to lose my voice and it happened. But, I'm better now.
Do you have a foot fetish?
I like to screw women who know how to wear sexy shoes, but I don't smell them or get off on touching them. But a woman who has great taste in shoes, I would choose her first over a lesser shoe wearing mare.
Does owning over 100 pair of shoes make me a fetishist?
No, it makes you well off or a hoarder. Do you wear them all? Are most of your shoes hold over from when you were in Junior High. I know a lot of women have that problem. (let go)
Are you really going to run a marathon?
Marathon... NO. Bloomsday Race... Yes. The major difference, Bloomsday is only seven miles and a marathon is.. A lot more miles. But I haven't seen the gym since I returned from Monterey so I am a few days behind in my training. Of course, being out of the country for seven weeks before the race will make it hard, but I will make it. I swear on all of your lives.
Did it rain in the mountains for 33 days like it did in Seattle?
No, those pussies in Seattle only saw half as many days as we did. It only made headlines because it was in Seattle. The rest of us in the state got left out of the media and that's why we are the "forgottens". So, shine that light on the western side of the mountains, I am content to be in the dark, soaking wet.
Have you ever worn a leather cock ring with spikes on it?
Yes. Once... Once. I don't recommend them. Spikes are mostly for show and I think are as silly looking as flowers or bows on bras. Spikes don't make you look tough. SCARS make you look tough. However, I like the Little Rubber Ring. Even though it grabbed a nut, it taught me to be forgiving and I forgive it. Leather chafes the nuts. Metal rings are awkward. Rubber hugs your body and tickles the imagination.
HEY, where's that magazine ad... I didn't get to email them yet...
If you haven't emailed, them do it. If you have emailed them, email me and let me know you have... so I know how many of you did.
Is it the Jimmy Stewart one? If not, which one is it?(three truths and a lie)
I did meet Jimmy Stewart. (by the way, this is the one everyone guessed) I was working on bio docs in LA and met Mr. Stewart at his house to talk about his thoughts on several different people. The one that is a lie... is up for debate. Hint: It's not the one about Jimmy Stewart
Why, of all the things that you mentioned, did you feel you had to mention corsets? (to each their own)
The inspiration for that post comes from a woman that I have been in touch with for a while now. She and her husband have been trying some new things and recently she purchased her first corset and was giving it a go. It was working some serious magic on her husband and in her excitement, she got worked up, started breathing hard (as hard as she could in the corset) and she passed out. That story, and several trends in recent emails from the readership, forced me to write that post. Corsets were just the first thing on my mind.
How is Heidi?
I realize that I haven't said much about her lately, but I can assure you that she is fine. There are noises that she will be seeing a younger man from Florida very, very soon. Other than that, she's fat, black, fed and still chewing on her leg.
Who is Adam? Where does he live? (friend)
Adam is the same person I wrote about from the new year's eve show of last year. I have known him since my late teens. He presently lives in Kansas City, KS and works as a delivery driver and professional Uncle. He puts almost every other Uncle to shame.
How many people have you stopped talking to? (friend)
Close to twenty. I miss them, but it's time to move on. If you don't want it to be you, call me.. or write.
Do you still smoke? (I am sick)
Yes, but it's slowing to a crawl. It's a hard habit to kick and I think I know why... It's not the nicotine that is screwing me up, it's the reward aspect of it. I enjoy the after sex, after meal, after writing, after long movie, after-after... Smoke. I need to find something else to do at those times. Sadly, the only thing anyone recommends instead of smoking is running. Running after sex just doesn't sound that effective. Running after a meal is dangerous. But, smoking is on the way out. So then I can be one of the semi-healthy dull people.
THE REST OF THESE ARE FROM ONE EMAIL.....
Why do men like women with big boobs?
They don't. Big boobs is a fetish. If you really asked most "men" they would indicate that smaller, handful sized are their favorite. However, larger boobies look good in certain clothes, as most women know, and that's one thing that draws men to them.
Why do men always want to have two women at once?
Again, they don't. And as I have written about before, it's not something that benefits a man at all. However, there are men that hold on to the belief that women are created to please men sexually and that two women are better than one. You can equate their knowledge to the same childlike belief that it would be cool to make a fort out of pillows. It sounds good in theory, but it's not likely to be the case in reality.
Why are relationships so hard?
Because we like them that way. The amount of variables that have to be taken into consideration to make a relationship work OR, to be a good idea, is staggering. You do it because it sounds like a good idea and it appeals to us on a primal level, but it's so complicated now, you either WANT it to happen, or you figure out reasons to make sure that it doesn't. Of course, this changes from moment to moment, so there is really no way to know what you are going to do.
Why are women always stealing other women's boyfriends?
You can't "steal" a person. That would make them a possession. If you view them as a possession, you don't deserve them and the universe will work hard to make sure you see that. Other women are just as greedy as you are. Always wanting what the other person has. Men cheat, women cheat. It's not specific to one sex or the other.
How do I know if my boyfriend is lying to me?
What is the issue? There are several ways to tell if a man is lying. The Government types call them "tells". - flushing of the cheeks, widening of the pupils, inability to stare at you, redirection of comments, sweaty palms - upper lip, and/or temples, fumbling with hands - usually with each other or object nearby, lack of facial movements, increase in blinking, grabbing of the nose/wiping of nose. (there are more) I guess you have to know your boyfriend and decide if what he is lying about is worth you caring about it.
What's the deal with men always looking at other women when you are out with them?
Either you are really boring or they are completely normal. If you don't like him looking, make him concentrate. Can't make him concentrate on you - ask what he likes about the women he's looking at. Get involved. OR look around yourself, OR dump him.
Do men ever ask directions?
Yes. It depends on the circumstances. In today's world, no matter who you ask, no one knows. So why bother?
Is it normal for men to fight all the time?
Testosterone is wicked harsh! I can't say that all men like to fight, but I know some men don't have all the mental strength in the world. Fighting is the dialogue of idiots and dullards. If you don't know any other way to get your point across verbally, you punch. It's singularly gratifying. Me want candy. Me take candy. Me eat candy. Candy good. Same principal. If you meet people like this, it's okay to use them. Take their money, their women and their personal property and make them thank you for it. They're pretty dumb. The same is true of women. The dumber you are, the more likely you are to swing.
Why do men like to be mothered?
Duh! Why do women look for men that remind them of their father? Issues!!!!! If all you know of a woman is that they baby you, then you expect women to baby you. Women are too blame. They raised these men.
You don't have to answer this one if you don't want to. What's the deal with anal sex?
If you don't know. Then buy yourself a butt plug or some anal beads and figure it out. If that doesn't work, go to a doctor and found out what's wrong with your butt. If you are one of those women with an "icky" issue. As in - I don't swallow, that's icky. Then you need to grow up. If you think your pussy is all that glorious, then you need to stick your mouth on one someday. It's all icky!!! (icky is why it's good)
THANK YOU ALL. IF YOU HAVE ANY QUESTIONS FOR ME OR IF YOU NEED SOMEONE TO VALIDATE YOUR EXISTENCE, CONTACT ME AT NATIVEROCK_2000@YAHOO.COM
What is the male equivalent of Bukkake?
Well, gay men love a good bukkake. Actually, there isn't a man that has ever lived that doesn't want to be in the middle of an orgy. I think that every male lives on the belief that his life will one day be, if it's not already, the center of the female sexual world.
Have you ever participated in a bukkake?
Hmmmm... I have put my "stuff" in some pretty interesting places. But never with the intention of being a "bukkake".
Do you really believe all that stuff about Iran and Canada?
Yes. Even though I was experiencing some serious delirium, I have been thinking about these issues for a while and have written about it before (i just didn't post it) but with the Canadian election and my willingness to showcase my mental status, I felt that the timing was perfect. If I were you, I would invest in bicycle tires and chain oil.
Do you think the Carlyle group is behind the recent decline in western civilization?
Yes - among other entities. Check out the money winners on the NASDAQ and AMEX since 9-11 and you can see who is responsible for what is happening to us today. The majority of the money makers earned lucrative, secret military contracts and are making so much money that they could have bought freedom from terrorism by now. Of course, not all of the big winners on the market are war profiteers, but if you follow the paper work, it all comes back to Haliburton, Carlyle and specialized Economic Development Corporations that Former Presidents are a part of.
What is wrong with your throat?
tonsillitis. Yucky white things started growing on my throat. I can't blame it on the Carlyle group, but I think a universal karma was working against me. I believe enough people held hands and prayed for me to lose my voice and it happened. But, I'm better now.
Do you have a foot fetish?
I like to screw women who know how to wear sexy shoes, but I don't smell them or get off on touching them. But a woman who has great taste in shoes, I would choose her first over a lesser shoe wearing mare.
Does owning over 100 pair of shoes make me a fetishist?
No, it makes you well off or a hoarder. Do you wear them all? Are most of your shoes hold over from when you were in Junior High. I know a lot of women have that problem. (let go)
Are you really going to run a marathon?
Marathon... NO. Bloomsday Race... Yes. The major difference, Bloomsday is only seven miles and a marathon is.. A lot more miles. But I haven't seen the gym since I returned from Monterey so I am a few days behind in my training. Of course, being out of the country for seven weeks before the race will make it hard, but I will make it. I swear on all of your lives.
Did it rain in the mountains for 33 days like it did in Seattle?
No, those pussies in Seattle only saw half as many days as we did. It only made headlines because it was in Seattle. The rest of us in the state got left out of the media and that's why we are the "forgottens". So, shine that light on the western side of the mountains, I am content to be in the dark, soaking wet.
Have you ever worn a leather cock ring with spikes on it?
Yes. Once... Once. I don't recommend them. Spikes are mostly for show and I think are as silly looking as flowers or bows on bras. Spikes don't make you look tough. SCARS make you look tough. However, I like the Little Rubber Ring. Even though it grabbed a nut, it taught me to be forgiving and I forgive it. Leather chafes the nuts. Metal rings are awkward. Rubber hugs your body and tickles the imagination.
HEY, where's that magazine ad... I didn't get to email them yet...
If you haven't emailed, them do it. If you have emailed them, email me and let me know you have... so I know how many of you did.
FEATURE WRITERS NEEDED
posted 01/05/2006
A quick three-question quiz: 1) Are you an experienced writer with a strong, lively voice? 2) Are you up-to-the-minute savvy with one or more of the following media, primarily of the independent and mildly subversive variety: modern music, arts, lit, film and pop culture? And 3): Are you capable and willing to generate creative, timely and unique topic-driven story pitches? Yes to all three you say? Then congrats you're our dream date! Of all three criteria, #3 can't be emphasized enough: your brain must be a boiling mass of clever and compelling ideas, from topical and investigative journalism pieces to stuff that's just damn funny. You think beyond the confines of artist profile pitches; you are a big-picture hipster who can detect relevance among cultural phenomena and brings ideas with depth to the editorial table that clearly answer the question: So what? What do you get in return? We pay you. Yes, modestly (out of indie-budget necessity, not because we are greedy slimeheads), but if you have an idea that sets our pants on fire, we'll host a bake sale or sell an unproductive intern on the black market to put coin in your hands. What else? Not only do you acquire resume clips from a respected national glossy magazine, you also get to work with a warm-fuzzy group of editors who will love you. Email your cover letter, clips, resume and several query pitches (1-200 words) to features editor, Kris Kendall (kris@resonancemag.com), and cc info@resonancemag.com.
Is it the Jimmy Stewart one? If not, which one is it?(three truths and a lie)
I did meet Jimmy Stewart. (by the way, this is the one everyone guessed) I was working on bio docs in LA and met Mr. Stewart at his house to talk about his thoughts on several different people. The one that is a lie... is up for debate. Hint: It's not the one about Jimmy Stewart
Why, of all the things that you mentioned, did you feel you had to mention corsets? (to each their own)
The inspiration for that post comes from a woman that I have been in touch with for a while now. She and her husband have been trying some new things and recently she purchased her first corset and was giving it a go. It was working some serious magic on her husband and in her excitement, she got worked up, started breathing hard (as hard as she could in the corset) and she passed out. That story, and several trends in recent emails from the readership, forced me to write that post. Corsets were just the first thing on my mind.
How is Heidi?
I realize that I haven't said much about her lately, but I can assure you that she is fine. There are noises that she will be seeing a younger man from Florida very, very soon. Other than that, she's fat, black, fed and still chewing on her leg.
Who is Adam? Where does he live? (friend)
Adam is the same person I wrote about from the new year's eve show of last year. I have known him since my late teens. He presently lives in Kansas City, KS and works as a delivery driver and professional Uncle. He puts almost every other Uncle to shame.
How many people have you stopped talking to? (friend)
Close to twenty. I miss them, but it's time to move on. If you don't want it to be you, call me.. or write.
Do you still smoke? (I am sick)
Yes, but it's slowing to a crawl. It's a hard habit to kick and I think I know why... It's not the nicotine that is screwing me up, it's the reward aspect of it. I enjoy the after sex, after meal, after writing, after long movie, after-after... Smoke. I need to find something else to do at those times. Sadly, the only thing anyone recommends instead of smoking is running. Running after sex just doesn't sound that effective. Running after a meal is dangerous. But, smoking is on the way out. So then I can be one of the semi-healthy dull people.
THE REST OF THESE ARE FROM ONE EMAIL.....
Why do men like women with big boobs?
They don't. Big boobs is a fetish. If you really asked most "men" they would indicate that smaller, handful sized are their favorite. However, larger boobies look good in certain clothes, as most women know, and that's one thing that draws men to them.
Why do men always want to have two women at once?
Again, they don't. And as I have written about before, it's not something that benefits a man at all. However, there are men that hold on to the belief that women are created to please men sexually and that two women are better than one. You can equate their knowledge to the same childlike belief that it would be cool to make a fort out of pillows. It sounds good in theory, but it's not likely to be the case in reality.
Why are relationships so hard?
Because we like them that way. The amount of variables that have to be taken into consideration to make a relationship work OR, to be a good idea, is staggering. You do it because it sounds like a good idea and it appeals to us on a primal level, but it's so complicated now, you either WANT it to happen, or you figure out reasons to make sure that it doesn't. Of course, this changes from moment to moment, so there is really no way to know what you are going to do.
Why are women always stealing other women's boyfriends?
You can't "steal" a person. That would make them a possession. If you view them as a possession, you don't deserve them and the universe will work hard to make sure you see that. Other women are just as greedy as you are. Always wanting what the other person has. Men cheat, women cheat. It's not specific to one sex or the other.
How do I know if my boyfriend is lying to me?
What is the issue? There are several ways to tell if a man is lying. The Government types call them "tells". - flushing of the cheeks, widening of the pupils, inability to stare at you, redirection of comments, sweaty palms - upper lip, and/or temples, fumbling with hands - usually with each other or object nearby, lack of facial movements, increase in blinking, grabbing of the nose/wiping of nose. (there are more) I guess you have to know your boyfriend and decide if what he is lying about is worth you caring about it.
What's the deal with men always looking at other women when you are out with them?
Either you are really boring or they are completely normal. If you don't like him looking, make him concentrate. Can't make him concentrate on you - ask what he likes about the women he's looking at. Get involved. OR look around yourself, OR dump him.
Do men ever ask directions?
Yes. It depends on the circumstances. In today's world, no matter who you ask, no one knows. So why bother?
Is it normal for men to fight all the time?
Testosterone is wicked harsh! I can't say that all men like to fight, but I know some men don't have all the mental strength in the world. Fighting is the dialogue of idiots and dullards. If you don't know any other way to get your point across verbally, you punch. It's singularly gratifying. Me want candy. Me take candy. Me eat candy. Candy good. Same principal. If you meet people like this, it's okay to use them. Take their money, their women and their personal property and make them thank you for it. They're pretty dumb. The same is true of women. The dumber you are, the more likely you are to swing.
Why do men like to be mothered?
Duh! Why do women look for men that remind them of their father? Issues!!!!! If all you know of a woman is that they baby you, then you expect women to baby you. Women are too blame. They raised these men.
You don't have to answer this one if you don't want to. What's the deal with anal sex?
If you don't know. Then buy yourself a butt plug or some anal beads and figure it out. If that doesn't work, go to a doctor and found out what's wrong with your butt. If you are one of those women with an "icky" issue. As in - I don't swallow, that's icky. Then you need to grow up. If you think your pussy is all that glorious, then you need to stick your mouth on one someday. It's all icky!!! (icky is why it's good)
THANK YOU ALL. IF YOU HAVE ANY QUESTIONS FOR ME OR IF YOU NEED SOMEONE TO VALIDATE YOUR EXISTENCE, CONTACT ME AT NATIVEROCK_2000@YAHOO.COM
posted by Daniel Loomis | 9:09 PM
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