hell hath no fury like a bird scorned
The familiar theme of the end of the world is again on the tips of everyones' tongues as the bird flu adds a new flavor to the deadly recipe that is Armageddon. So now, not only do you have to worry about terrorists blowing up your local blockbuster video store or the American President handing out key leadership roles to people that can't run your local swimming pool or gas prices rising so high that the world markets could fail driving us all back to cave dwelling, now you have to worry that your bucket of Kentucky Fried might contain a deadly virus that could kill your whole family. The Western world has enough paranoia floating around in it's head right now it doesn't need something else to be watching out for but we can now add, "don't let that bird shit on you" to the list of terrorist threats and reasons for taking xanax.
In an article in Newsweek, the bird flu was broken down as simply as it possibly could be so that all the innocent, not-so-good-at-all-that-science-stuff people could understand. To break it down, it's coming soon. It's coming our way and when I mean "our way" I mean toward the western, television watching world. So far the bird flu has found it's way to Siberia, Turkey and to some degree, Europe from it's origins in Asia, where all things in this world are manufactured. (because labor there is cheaper and works harder than their American counterparts) It's not across either pond as of yet, but it's time is coming. It might travel south from Europe to Africa with the great winter migration, sail over the pond from Africa to South America and then head north with the spring migration, thus landing in Detroit sometime around May. If can make waves in Detroit then we are all fucked. Those among us with allergies, asthma, weakened immune systems and the very young and the elderly are at the highest risk of dying from the flu, even though it's not clear if we humans can even catch it. There seems to be a problem with the whole viral transfer from birds to humans. Something about their genes not being like our genes. I suggest condoms as the leading preventive measure. OR, put your trust in Jesus, cause only the sinners, heathens, and the children of sodom will suffer from this plague and only those that have been dipped in a muddy creek in Kansas will survive. (I think that's how it goes....)
Not to be out done by this tragedy, dilemma or whatever we are going to call it (I guess we will have to wait and see if they have a star studded telethon on NBC to determine how severe it is and what we should call it) the world of big business, big government and big sneaky bastards have already figured out how to profit from our paranoia by revealing that the only known preventive medicine for this pandemic is a miracle drug that we have huge stockpiles of. No, it's not a bunch of bibles or a carb free diet plan with plenty of exercise, it's a miracle drug, that just happens to be rotting in a warehouse, waiting for it's moment... to be a major part in a serious fraud that could cost millions of lives. What they aren't going to tell you about this drug is the reason it has been stockpiling in a warehouse for five years is that because when it was introduced five years ago as a flu vaccine and an anti-virus medication, it didn't work at all. Not even in the slightest. They weren't able to sell a single dose of it to anyone due to it's ineffectiveness but now - Surprise! It works. I guess any drug works when you need to unload it before the expiration date runs out and you stand to lose millions of dollars because of it.
With all this turmoil, the big trend in American life is again, Y2K hysteria. Start stocking up the goods and preparing for the world to go dark. You can't trust your neighbors and the stores won't have goods, employees or power, so you better make sure you have all you need before the newscaster takes his life on live television. It's in these times when I think it's fun to see what kind of survival we will see. Will your ability to fold a shirt neatly and display it on a table or run a cash register, help you in the next evolution of human existence? What job skills, life skills or value do you have for the next phase of human development? Do you have a plan or some idea of what you might do when the shit hits the fan? Is your plan to "go to a friend's house in the country"? Or is it to seek out the government and ask them for help? How will you make it there and are you sure that your friend in the country will really want your extra mouth around? Do you know how to make a fire from two sticks? Find fresh water? And remember, all of this has to be done with a deadly bird flu and Mormon missionaries running around trying to infect you. Is there anything in this life that is preparing you for the next one? The religious are fond of saying that and I guess they weren't talking about life after death as it applies to breathing, but life after death as it applies to toilet no longer flushing.
I am not sure what or when the next great scare will be and I am not sure if or when the powers that be plan on releasing some of the tension that is building up inside of their communities, but I think we are all due for some. We either need a really good sports victory to celebrate, a feel good romantic comedy, indie film to talk about or a healthy revolution that actually works to give us a sense of hope that we are all working for a goal that lies in the right direction. That we are all worthy, even if all we know how to do is make a mocha. I believe that it's in the darkest times of our existence that we have shown our greatest trait as a species, that we choose to live regardless of how bad the conditions may be. That even though life isn't as comfortable as it once was, we can make a life from what we have left. We don't need a telethon to do it for us.
In an article in Newsweek, the bird flu was broken down as simply as it possibly could be so that all the innocent, not-so-good-at-all-that-science-stuff people could understand. To break it down, it's coming soon. It's coming our way and when I mean "our way" I mean toward the western, television watching world. So far the bird flu has found it's way to Siberia, Turkey and to some degree, Europe from it's origins in Asia, where all things in this world are manufactured. (because labor there is cheaper and works harder than their American counterparts) It's not across either pond as of yet, but it's time is coming. It might travel south from Europe to Africa with the great winter migration, sail over the pond from Africa to South America and then head north with the spring migration, thus landing in Detroit sometime around May. If can make waves in Detroit then we are all fucked. Those among us with allergies, asthma, weakened immune systems and the very young and the elderly are at the highest risk of dying from the flu, even though it's not clear if we humans can even catch it. There seems to be a problem with the whole viral transfer from birds to humans. Something about their genes not being like our genes. I suggest condoms as the leading preventive measure. OR, put your trust in Jesus, cause only the sinners, heathens, and the children of sodom will suffer from this plague and only those that have been dipped in a muddy creek in Kansas will survive. (I think that's how it goes....)
Not to be out done by this tragedy, dilemma or whatever we are going to call it (I guess we will have to wait and see if they have a star studded telethon on NBC to determine how severe it is and what we should call it) the world of big business, big government and big sneaky bastards have already figured out how to profit from our paranoia by revealing that the only known preventive medicine for this pandemic is a miracle drug that we have huge stockpiles of. No, it's not a bunch of bibles or a carb free diet plan with plenty of exercise, it's a miracle drug, that just happens to be rotting in a warehouse, waiting for it's moment... to be a major part in a serious fraud that could cost millions of lives. What they aren't going to tell you about this drug is the reason it has been stockpiling in a warehouse for five years is that because when it was introduced five years ago as a flu vaccine and an anti-virus medication, it didn't work at all. Not even in the slightest. They weren't able to sell a single dose of it to anyone due to it's ineffectiveness but now - Surprise! It works. I guess any drug works when you need to unload it before the expiration date runs out and you stand to lose millions of dollars because of it.
With all this turmoil, the big trend in American life is again, Y2K hysteria. Start stocking up the goods and preparing for the world to go dark. You can't trust your neighbors and the stores won't have goods, employees or power, so you better make sure you have all you need before the newscaster takes his life on live television. It's in these times when I think it's fun to see what kind of survival we will see. Will your ability to fold a shirt neatly and display it on a table or run a cash register, help you in the next evolution of human existence? What job skills, life skills or value do you have for the next phase of human development? Do you have a plan or some idea of what you might do when the shit hits the fan? Is your plan to "go to a friend's house in the country"? Or is it to seek out the government and ask them for help? How will you make it there and are you sure that your friend in the country will really want your extra mouth around? Do you know how to make a fire from two sticks? Find fresh water? And remember, all of this has to be done with a deadly bird flu and Mormon missionaries running around trying to infect you. Is there anything in this life that is preparing you for the next one? The religious are fond of saying that and I guess they weren't talking about life after death as it applies to breathing, but life after death as it applies to toilet no longer flushing.
I am not sure what or when the next great scare will be and I am not sure if or when the powers that be plan on releasing some of the tension that is building up inside of their communities, but I think we are all due for some. We either need a really good sports victory to celebrate, a feel good romantic comedy, indie film to talk about or a healthy revolution that actually works to give us a sense of hope that we are all working for a goal that lies in the right direction. That we are all worthy, even if all we know how to do is make a mocha. I believe that it's in the darkest times of our existence that we have shown our greatest trait as a species, that we choose to live regardless of how bad the conditions may be. That even though life isn't as comfortable as it once was, we can make a life from what we have left. We don't need a telethon to do it for us.
posted by Daniel Loomis | 9:55 AM
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