the invasion of Japan
Episode 5
Japanadana
The luggage has arrived! It has traveled for a full week and seen more of the world than I have, and has racked up some serious frequent flier miles, but we have finally been reunited. I opened the bag in my room and it was like Christmas had come early in Japan. There, in front of me, were wonderful options. AND... American Spirit cigarettes. I am thankful for every god that made smoking fun. I have been smoking a new brand of Japanese cigarettes every time I needed a pack and I am through with Japanese tobako. I have been using this same principal of trying something new, each time I have purchased food, water or chocolate. Most of the time it has worked out, but the times that it doesn't, it hurts. My colon and my taste buds haven't always agreed with my attitude and have reminded me of this on several occasions. There is some bottled water here that taste like monkey vomit or sweat off of a yak's balls.
I am sad that I have to throw away the clothes that I have been wearing for the past week. I had grown accustomed to them and we have seen some wonderful things together. I was actually pretty used to the fact that I didn't have to make wardrobe decisions every day and it's sad to think that these clothes won't see the rest of my trip. I don't have to throw them away, but for betterment of diplomatic relations with those I have to sit next to on buses, planes and restaurants, I should probably let them go. I am not sad about throwing away the socks, they can fuck right off.
You might be wondering why I haven't purchased clothes up to this point, well it's hard enough for me to find my sizes in America, and in Japan it's even harder. They have two sizes here, normal and Sumo and I am somewhere in between. The one thing you can find in abundance is socks. There are sock stores everywhere and the people of Japan have no qualms about wearing any combination of socks with any outfit. Socks are almost as sacred as Buddhist temples and are as easy to find as chopsticks. But even with their frequency, I haven't purchased any socks and this is for several reasons; I am trying to moderate my spending and I am not that fond of brightly colored, textured socks. White will do just fine, occasionally black or gray, but never "hello kitty".
I was hoping that when I got here things would be cheaper than in America and the only thing that this is true for is cigarettes and food. Everything else is 50% more expensive. A good camera - 7 or 8 megapixels - 500 bucks. They are sleek looking and probably top of the line but they come with Japanese instructions. An Ipod mini or nano - 160 or 250 bucks depending, but cooler looking than the ones in the states. T-shirts, pack of three - 18 bucks. I came here with 300 bucks to spend on food and fun and I can't cut into that money for clothes. The fact that I am not spending money on electrical goodies means I have more money for rice and noodles (2 or 3 bucks and damn tasty, but they can burn through you pretty quick).
Today was a better day all around. It was a slower day of walking around looking at some local Sasebo sites and a radio show to promote the show. It's nice to take it easy for a day and not try and kill myself to get in every "once in a lifetime" site before I leave. It helps that I don't have to do laundry today...
I did an interview with Armed Forces Radio and for the first time in my comedy career, found a DJ that actually prepared and had interesting questions. No matter how good of a radio show you do, it rarely affects the number of people at your show. This is true in the states where people have options of stations to listen too. Here, this is it. Every American or English speaking soul within earshot of a radio is tuned in and I am talking to the Greater Pacific rim. ( not that I expect marines in Guam to make the show). The interview goes well and I am glad we did this now so the upcoming shows know what they are getting.
Before the show, what would be the club manager tells myself and the other comic that we have to be clean and this sends us into hysterics. Thankfully I am closing and have 45 minutes to remember my clean material, Ponchi, the other comic, is dead in the water. The audience is thin but they are active and they really enjoy whatever we can bring them. Ponchi does okay and my show goes down without a hitch. After the show, Ponchi and I are "letting it out" when the owner comes to us and says that we were the best show in the ten year run of the tour. I have heard this before, but apparently he means it... So says the staff... I have heard that before too.
It's four hours before the next flight, next stop. TOKYO!!!
Japanadana
The luggage has arrived! It has traveled for a full week and seen more of the world than I have, and has racked up some serious frequent flier miles, but we have finally been reunited. I opened the bag in my room and it was like Christmas had come early in Japan. There, in front of me, were wonderful options. AND... American Spirit cigarettes. I am thankful for every god that made smoking fun. I have been smoking a new brand of Japanese cigarettes every time I needed a pack and I am through with Japanese tobako. I have been using this same principal of trying something new, each time I have purchased food, water or chocolate. Most of the time it has worked out, but the times that it doesn't, it hurts. My colon and my taste buds haven't always agreed with my attitude and have reminded me of this on several occasions. There is some bottled water here that taste like monkey vomit or sweat off of a yak's balls.
I am sad that I have to throw away the clothes that I have been wearing for the past week. I had grown accustomed to them and we have seen some wonderful things together. I was actually pretty used to the fact that I didn't have to make wardrobe decisions every day and it's sad to think that these clothes won't see the rest of my trip. I don't have to throw them away, but for betterment of diplomatic relations with those I have to sit next to on buses, planes and restaurants, I should probably let them go. I am not sad about throwing away the socks, they can fuck right off.
You might be wondering why I haven't purchased clothes up to this point, well it's hard enough for me to find my sizes in America, and in Japan it's even harder. They have two sizes here, normal and Sumo and I am somewhere in between. The one thing you can find in abundance is socks. There are sock stores everywhere and the people of Japan have no qualms about wearing any combination of socks with any outfit. Socks are almost as sacred as Buddhist temples and are as easy to find as chopsticks. But even with their frequency, I haven't purchased any socks and this is for several reasons; I am trying to moderate my spending and I am not that fond of brightly colored, textured socks. White will do just fine, occasionally black or gray, but never "hello kitty".
I was hoping that when I got here things would be cheaper than in America and the only thing that this is true for is cigarettes and food. Everything else is 50% more expensive. A good camera - 7 or 8 megapixels - 500 bucks. They are sleek looking and probably top of the line but they come with Japanese instructions. An Ipod mini or nano - 160 or 250 bucks depending, but cooler looking than the ones in the states. T-shirts, pack of three - 18 bucks. I came here with 300 bucks to spend on food and fun and I can't cut into that money for clothes. The fact that I am not spending money on electrical goodies means I have more money for rice and noodles (2 or 3 bucks and damn tasty, but they can burn through you pretty quick).
Today was a better day all around. It was a slower day of walking around looking at some local Sasebo sites and a radio show to promote the show. It's nice to take it easy for a day and not try and kill myself to get in every "once in a lifetime" site before I leave. It helps that I don't have to do laundry today...
I did an interview with Armed Forces Radio and for the first time in my comedy career, found a DJ that actually prepared and had interesting questions. No matter how good of a radio show you do, it rarely affects the number of people at your show. This is true in the states where people have options of stations to listen too. Here, this is it. Every American or English speaking soul within earshot of a radio is tuned in and I am talking to the Greater Pacific rim. ( not that I expect marines in Guam to make the show). The interview goes well and I am glad we did this now so the upcoming shows know what they are getting.
Before the show, what would be the club manager tells myself and the other comic that we have to be clean and this sends us into hysterics. Thankfully I am closing and have 45 minutes to remember my clean material, Ponchi, the other comic, is dead in the water. The audience is thin but they are active and they really enjoy whatever we can bring them. Ponchi does okay and my show goes down without a hitch. After the show, Ponchi and I are "letting it out" when the owner comes to us and says that we were the best show in the ten year run of the tour. I have heard this before, but apparently he means it... So says the staff... I have heard that before too.
It's four hours before the next flight, next stop. TOKYO!!!
posted by Daniel Loomis | 8:35 PM
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